CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
