Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
