He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
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