Your dad touched me again.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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