I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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