he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
