If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
it was like having sex with a tree stump
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
