so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
