Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?