Who wears a wallet chain?!
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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