I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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