Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
