I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize