Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I have aggressive nipples.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize