So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
