I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
