We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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