I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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