My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
