It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
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did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
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I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
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