i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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