another moral hangover. fuck.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
