He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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