idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
