Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
jump out the window naked night went bad
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
