so explain again why im purple
no
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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