i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize