All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
