we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
