he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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