I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
