Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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