i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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