Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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