I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Randomize
