Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
