So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Every concussion has its silver lining
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize