Texts From Last Night

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  (817): View more from Texas

  I showed him my bush... on skype.

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  (817): I showed him my bush... on skype. http://tfl.nu/384w
  Replies (40) Good night (776) Bad night (4140)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"

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  (908): there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel" http://tfl.nu/ti94
  Replies (12) Good night (883) Bad night (2146)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.

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  (214): My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night. http://tfl.nu/bjzh
  Replies (20) Good night (6853) Bad night (1046)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport

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  (313): awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport http://tfl.nu/bmz0
  Replies (25) Good night (4939) Bad night (657)
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  (661): View more from California

  Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.

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  (661): Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat. http://tfl.nu/08yi
  Replies (5) Good night (886) Bad night (2326)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out

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  (508): That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out http://tfl.nu/67gz
  Replies (3) Good night (3237) Bad night (889)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on

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  (905): It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on http://tfl.nu/h715
  Replies (9) Good night (1971) Bad night (1156)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...

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  (603): oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar... http://tfl.nu/mqjx
  Replies (12) Good night (607) Bad night (1316)
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  (916): View more from California

  Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.

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  (916): Need. Hospital. Physically am floating. http://tfl.nu/j2sm
  Replies (6) Good night (1085) Bad night (530)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...

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  (603): Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing... http://tfl.nu/j7d9
  Replies (6) Good night (2473) Bad night (501)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.

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  (484): She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months. http://tfl.nu/6km6
  Replies (9) Good night (1860) Bad night (765)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.

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  (914): Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket. http://tfl.nu/amsn
  Replies (4) Good night (1829) Bad night (262)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"

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  (803): I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge" http://tfl.nu/k0vq
  Replies (4) Good night (1109) Bad night (302)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.

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  (423): I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type. http://tfl.nu/54at
  Replies (6) Good night (334) Bad night (1075)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?

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  (803): Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick? http://tfl.nu/r3gk
  Replies (4) Good night (1391) Bad night (260)

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