He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i just google imaged poop.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
