I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
