Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating