i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
nutella sex= disaster
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
