I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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