Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
