yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize
