my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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