WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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