i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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