I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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