Nicole vs. Life
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
